7 Powerful Questions That Will Help You Get Exactly What You Want

If I could show you how to get crystal clear about your goals and effortlessly start taking action in the right direction, would you be interested?
In this article we’re going to go through seven powerful questions that will not only help you get clear about what you want, but also identify the obstacles and eliminate them.
These are some of the questions I use in my coaching sessions to help you get clear about what you want and make it so effortless for you that you can’t not take action.
What you’ll really love about these questions is how simple they are. I recommend you grab a pen and a piece of paper and follow along with the questions.
This will help you integrate them and really make progress in your life, which is what you want, right?
For the purposes of this article, I’m going to travel back in time to when I wanted to start Wake Up Cloud, so you can get a concrete example of how these questions are used.

1. What do you want?

What is it that you truly want? If you were a client, I’d dive into this question more deeply because there are always multiple layers, but for the sake of this article, I’ll keep it brief.
Before I started Wake Up Cloud, my heart was telling me to just go ahead and start. I wanted to help people, share what I knew, and also make a living doing what I love.
I had a yearning to do something else than be a professional poker player. Looking back now I see that I’ve always wanted to do this, but I just wasn’t ready, until now.

2. Why do you want that?

The next question focuses on the purpose. Why do you want what you want?
You’re writing all this down, aren’t you?
I wanted to start Wake Up Cloud because I wanted to feel fulfilled. I wanted to feel good about myself, and I felt like it was something that I was drawn to do.
That is the simplest way I can put it.

3. What stops you?

Next we come to a really interesting question, which helps you identify the obstacles that stop you from taking action right away.
What stopped me was that I didn’t believe I had anything to share with the world. I looked at other personal development bloggers, authors and speakers, and they seemed to know so much and I so little.
It took me a few years to finally reach the point where I got mad at myself and took action even though I wasn’t sure I had anything to contribute.
And I’m glad I did.

4. Why is it like that?

Once you’ve identified what stops you, it’s time to look at why you have the obstacles in the first place. Where have they come from?
My obstacle was that I didn’t believe I knew enough. I wish I had known what I know now, because it would’ve helped me tremendously in getting started faster and with more confidence.
Why did I believe that I didn’t have enough to share? How did I know that was the case? This is where it gets tricky for me. Many of these questions really make you think.
We often take our beliefs and thoughts for granted. Once you start really looking at them, they start breaking down if they aren’t useful, and you become free from the shackles of your mind.
I believed that I wasn’t enough because I went inside and tried to compare myself to people that had been doing this for years. It didn’t match, which “told” me that I wasn’t good enough.
These kinds of limiting beliefs are what usually stop people from going after what they truly want.

5. How have you been perceiving this as a problem until now?

How have you perceived this to be a problem in your life? I mean, I could’ve just decided to not start Wake Up Cloud and the problem would’ve been solved, right?
The problem was that I wanted to do something that I knew I could do, but I was comparing myself to other people and stopping myself from taking action.
Funny how that works, isn’t it?
One part of me was saying, “Go for it!” while the other was saying “Wait a minute, you don’t know enough. What if you fail?”
The funny thing about a split like this is that usually both parts want the same thing. They want what is best for me.

6. What would you like to believe?

What would you like to believe instead of the limiting belief? This is an interesting question, because it lets you discover that you have choice, and that you’ve always had choice.
In my case, what I would’ve wanted to believe at that point is that I do know enough, and that I can learn whatever I need to know as I am taking action.
This question helps you imagine what you want and look at the future differently. We can often get stuck in one way of thinking, so jumping out of that can begin to break the spell of the old belief.
So imagine, what would you like to believe instead? How would it feel if you believed something more positive and empowering?
And how would your future look different if you did that now?

7. What would happen if you could?

Last, but not least, what would happen if you could? This is an eye-opener for many, because it may open your eyes to something scary.
What I mean by that is that you may be afraid of success in some way.
For example, what would happen if I did start Wake Up Cloud? My thoughts at the time would’ve probably been that I then would have to put myself out there.
I might have to do interviews, create products, and learn all kinds of new stuff. This is all unknown territory which had the potential to evoke a lot of old fears.
So in some way, my limiting beliefs were helping me stay away from this. Once you’ve identified what’s going on, you can deal with it and starting flying toward what you truly want from life.

By: Henri
Source: Wake Up Cloud

3 Simple Ways to Start Raising Your Self-Esteem Today

Image by ·Insomnia·

“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.”
Unknown

Your self-esteem is one of the most important things in life. It is one of those things that will make a huge difference for you if you work on it.

As you raise your self-esteem you will for instance:

• Feel more deserving and trusting in yourself. This will allow you to more fully explore your own potential and start going for your dreams and happiness. Instead of holding yourself back in life because you do not think you deserve good things or because of fear of failure, rejection etc.
• Live as you want. Not just when it comes to your goals and dreams. But also in the way that you will be better at standing up for yourself, asking for what you really want, saying no and to not feel pressured by shoulds or perfectionism.
• Stop feeling lousy about yourself and start feeling that you are OK and good. Sure, life still has its ups and downs with better self-esteem but those ups and downs also become easier to handle. And if you become more understanding, accepting and loving of yourself then just about any day in life will become better and happier than it used to be.

Those are a couple of reasons why I have created my brand new course, the Self-Esteem Course. It will launch on Tuesday as the headline mentions.

But that is not the only thing about self-esteem that I wanted to share today. I also wanted to share three simple ways that you can start using today to start raising or to better maintain your own self-esteem.

1. The daily self-appreciation journal.
It is easy to get lost in basing your self-esteem on just what you accomplish, on what you get done in a day or week. But basing your self-esteem on just that makes it pretty unstable.
One way help yourself out with that and with appreciating what is good and awesome about you is to use a self-appreciation journal.

You can do that by taking out a pen and notepad (or use a word processor on your computer or cell phone) every evening for a week. There you write down 5 things you appreciate about yourself. But make sure that you do not only write down accomplishments. Also write down good stuff related to your core-self esteem. By that I mean things that always there no matter how you perform at work or in school. It could be things/traits like your sense of humor, your kindness, your honesty, wisdom, creativity and so on.

If you like, continue to make this kind of journaling a habit of yours after the first week is up.

2. The stop word or stop-phrase.
We all have an inner critic. The critic can spur you on to get things done and to behave in way that gains acceptance from the people around you. But it can also drag you and your self-esteem down.
The inner critic whispers or shouts thoughts in your mind. It could be thoughts like:

• You are lazy and sloppy too, now get to work.
• No one really likes you for who you are.
• You always fail in relationships.
• You aren’t good at your job at all and someone will figure that out and throw you out.
• You are worse or uglier than someone else.

Now, the inner critic can as I mentioned help you to be productive and so on. But there are alternatives that are better. If you want to become more effective then it will for example be healthier and more productive to remind yourself of your major reasons for doing what you do each day. You could write down the most important reasons why you are focusing on this project, on these classes in school and so on and put that note where you will see it every day.

But, as you start going on that other, healthier path, you also have to stop the critic so it does not start to drag you down. You have to talk back to it.

You can do so by simply creating a stop word or stop-phrase that you say or shout in your mind whenever your critic pipes up with a distorted and self-esteem hurting thought.
Simply say: Stop!

Or use something else. I like these two phrases:

• No, no, no, we are not going there!
• No, that is just stupid.

They have worked well for me to get the inner critic to shut up. Try these ones out or create one that feels good and works for you.

Then use it to not get dragged down by your own inner critic when it may get triggered by for example criticism or a mistake in everyday life. And as you use the word or phrase and it becomes a habit and as you find healthier paths towards what you want your critic will pop up up less and less.

3. Be kind and understanding towards others (and yourself).
By being kinder towards and more understanding of others if becomes easier to do the same to yourself. One simple way to focus on being more understanding and kind when you feel the need to judge someone is to use helpful questions. One I find to be really effective is:
What parts of this person can I see in myself? How is he or she like me?

This one helps me to shift my perspective from what is different and what I feel the need to judge to what we have in common instead. This tears down the mental barriers between us and I can feel closer to and more understanding of this person.

Try it out whenever you feel the need to judge someone, no matter if it is someone close to you or someone you don’t even know.

By doing so it becomes more natural to extend and use this more understanding and kind frame of mind when you view yourself too. And by behaving in this way towards others you will feel better about yourself and in that way raise your self-esteem too.

By: Henrik Edberg
Source: The Positivity Blog

How to Greatly Improve Your Results

If you want to greatly improve your results in whatever goal you are trying to obtain, there is one thing you can do to make this happen. Before I get into that though, let's take a look at how most people try to achieve their goals. By understanding this, you will see just why the method I am going to tell will work so well. Normally when people set a goal, the excitement is high and the energy level is plentiful. So they go out and start taking massive amounts of action. This is great, but what normally happens after a few weeks or months is that they start going into a passive state of mind. Basically, their intensity level plummets and they find themselves less passionate about obtaining their goals and struggle to continue taking action at the level they were before. So to greatly improve your results, you must increase your intensity. Let's look at an example of this in the world of sports. If you've ever played a sport where you compete head on with your opponent, you will notice that often times you can defeat a person with more skill than you by simply playing at a higher intensity level than they are playing. When I say high intensity level, what I mean is that you are not holding anything back. You are going full out during the duration of the match. I have experienced this myself many times playing various sports. For some reason, whenever I compete with someone who I know is better than me, my intensity level goes through the roof. I will go all out just to be able to keep up with their level of play. The odd thing is that even if they are more skilled than me, I sometimes find myself being able to beat them or at least come very close. In contrast, when I compete with someone who I know I can beat, my intensity level is usually a lot lower. Here's what I am getting at. If you want to greatly improve your results in achieving your goals, you need to increase your intensity, and the way you do that is by seeing yourself as the underdog. Now, as a side note, this won't work for everyone. People who are not competitive by nature, will normally shy away and back down when the odds are stacked against them. So if this is you, this probably won't work. However, you can still increase your intensity simply by revisiting your reasons to achieve your goals in the first place. Those of you who are used to competition and usually play at a much higher level when coming up against someone who is more skilled than you, seeing yourself as the underdog can help you increase your intensity. This is a way to bring out that warrior within you, that winning spirit. It's the voice inside of you that screams, "I will not back down!" When you pursue your goals with that kind of mentality and intensity compared to going at it in a passive manner, you will greatly increase your odds of obtaining your goals. Until next time... Love Life. Do Good. Live Well. By: Kevin Ngo Source: Motivation Well Being

The 5 Best Ways to Praise Employees

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Think your "Employee of the Month" program is a great way to recognize performance?
Think again. Praising an employee should:

• Boost their confidence and self esteem, and
• Reinforce positive behaviors, and
• Reward their effort and accomplishment, and
• Build their motivation and enthusiasm...

Can a special parking spot, or a photo in the newsletter, or a $20 gift card really accomplish all that? Nope.

Here are five great ways to praise employees:

1. Ask for their help. Asking another person for help is possibly the most sincere way to recognize their abilities and value. Why? Asking makes us vulnerable: We admit weakness or need or a lack of skill. Ask employees for help and not only do you show you respect their skills, you also extend your trust.

The key is to ask for help partly or totally unrelated to their function, and to make the assistance relatively personal to you. I once returned from a corporate meeting where layoffs had been discussed. I proposed alternatives to cutting staffing but was unsuccessful. By the time I got back word had already spread throughout the plant that layoffs were imminent. Just before the plant meeting one of my employees said, "So, layoffs, huh?" I didn't have to confirm it; he knew. I said, "I have no idea what to tell our employees. What would you say?"

He thought and said, "Just tell everyone you tried. Then talk about where we go from here."

Simple? Sure. But powerful. Later he told me how much it meant to him that I had wanted his opinion and took his advice.

2. Ask for their ideas. Again, make it somewhat unrelated to the employee's function. For example, don't go the typical, "Do you have any ideas regarding how you can do your job faster?" route. Instead, build off skills or insights they possess to use them in other ways.

Say an HR employee is incredibly organized. Say, "I'm always impressed by how organized you are; I wish we could clone you." Then ask if she has thoughts about how to streamline warehouse processing, or streamline the paperwork involved in hiring new employees, or how another department could handle data collection more efficiently. Not only will you get great ideas, but you also recognize skill and ability in a more meaningful way than simply saying, "Wow, you're awesome."

3. Create informal leadership roles. Putting an employee in a short-term informal leadership role can make a major impact. Think how you would feel if your boss said, "We're swamped... and now we have this huge customer problem. If we don't take care of it we may lose them. Can you grab a few people and handle it for me?"

Informal leadership roles show you trust an employee's skills and judgment. The more important the task, the higher the implied praise and the greater the boost to their self esteem.

4. Do something together. Since you're the boss, you and your employees are on unequal footing. A great way to recognize an employee's value -- especially their value to you -- is to tackle a task together.

Years ago my boss said, "I'm thinking of joining Toastmasters to improve my presentation skills. Would you be interested in joining with me? Might be good for both of us..." I was flattered he asked, flattered he saw me as someone who would someday need great presentation skills....

What you choose to do together doesn't have to be outside of work, of course. The key is to do something as relative equals, not as boss and employee. Unequal separates; equal elevates.

5. Play Priceline.com. Congratulate an employee for a job well done, then let them name their "price." Say, "You did an outstanding job; what can I do to reward you?"

You might be surprised by how simple the reward they choose will be.

Bottom line: Verbal praise is always great, but implied praise can be even more powerful. Asking for help or ideas, putting an employee in charge, dropping hierarchical roles and working together... each is a powerful way to recognize the true value of your employees.

And to show you trust them -- which is the highest praise of all.

By: Jeff Haden

 

Source: CBS Money Watch

5 Simple Principles for Becoming an Expert

There aren’t shortcuts.
Merely direct paths.
Most people don’t take them, because they frighten us.
Things that look like shortcuts are usually detours disguised as less work.
-Seth Godin

For the past month, I’ve been studying people who have become skilled and knowledgeable enough to be called “experts” in preparation for the launch of a new blog.
I’ve interviewed experts, spent time with them and have asked them whether shortcuts exist to becoming an expert (and received some incredible responses like the one from Seth Godin above). I’ve even read books by people who study success and expertise (expertologists?).

Part of me expected to find some secret shortcuts to becoming an expert, and part of me knew better. I’m most interested in how people gain expert-level skills and knowledge on multiple subjects quickly. Being a renaissance man has always appealed to me, as has getting very good at just a couple of things. Both types of expertise are as fascinating as they are useful.

Despite wanting to believe secrets and shortcuts to expertise exist, deep down I think I’ve always known what you probably know too: becoming an expert takes hard work, focus and dedication.
There are certainly ways to become an expert faster than traditional teaching might dictate, but there’s no getting around putting your time in.

The good news is, becoming an expert is much like changing a habit. The fact that secrets don’t exist is a good thing in my book, because we can stop wasting time searching for secrets and start making direct progress towards our goals.

Instead of looking for secrets, rely simply on these best practices for becoming an expert:

1. Realize expert is a relative term.
I’m a big believer in relative expertise. For most purposes, you don’t need to be the world’s foremost expert on something to benefit from what you know. Being expert enough means knowing enough or being good enough to accomplish your goals, however modest or grand they may be.
Someone once told me to think about expertise as a scale from one to ten, not as an absolute. If you’re a two or three on the scale, you’re expert enough to help people who are ones and twos. In fact, you might be better suited to helping beginners than a ten on the expert scale, because you’re closer to their level and better understand where they’re coming from.

2. Learn from books and experience.
There’s a time for learning and a time for practicing. A true expert needs to have both expertise (book learning) and experience (real-world practice).
For example, if you want to become a bodybuilder, all the reading you can possibly do won’t help you actually build muscle (unless they’re really heavy books). On the other hand, would-be bodybuilders who just jump into lifting weights without learning about best practices won’t know time-saving techniques and principles for optimum rep counts, resting time between sets, nutrition, supplements and more.

There’s a balance between learning and doing. Most people spend far too much time doing one or the other. If you’ve been mostly learning, it’s probably time to start doing. If you’ve long been practicing without the results you’re looking for, it’s time to learn more and time to focus, which brings us to point #3.

3. Focus.
Just as Leo advocates for changing habits, focus is a powerful ally for gaining expertise (especially in the beginning).

When you start learning something new, it’s easy to become daunted by everything you have to master to reach your final goal. Instead of just focusing on the very next step you need to take, it’s easy to be overwhelmed by the bigger picture.

Focus is critical for two reasons. First, it helps you pay attention to the task at hand so you don’t become paralyzed by the thought of everything to follow. Second, you have to focus so you can ignore all the possible distractions that are always waiting to pull you off your path.
You can follow Leo’s four steps for changing habits to focus on what you need to become an expert:

1. Start very small.
2. Do only one change at a time.
3. Be present and enjoy the activity (don’t focus on results).
4. Be grateful for every step you take.

4. Get outside help.
When I asked productivity coach Charlie Gilkey about whether shortcuts exist to becoming an expert, he pointed out another critical aspect of gaining expertise:

When you look at peak-performing experts, you’ll often see that they have either coaches, involved mentors, or a pack of growth-oriented friends that help them excel. You simply can’t gauge your performance as well as someone external can, and, past the “competent” stage of skill acquisition, it gets increasingly harder to both observe what you’re doing and find quick and easy answers as to how to improve.

At some point, learning and practicing will only get you so far. You need feedback from outsiders to uncover more opportunities for improvement.

5. Make mistakes.
Fear of failure might be the biggest opponent you’ll face on your road to learning new things.
Take something as simple as learning a language. As language hacking expert Benny Lewis explains, people who speak a language learn it. People who don’t speak a language don’t learn it. It’s simple: you need to learn and practice. What keeps many people from practicing a language is the fear of making mistakes and embarrassing themselves.

You have to be willing to make mistakes in order to learn and grow. That’s what practice is. The sooner you get comfortable with making mistakes, the quicker you’ll learn your new skill.

What’s on your wish list to learn and do?
Maybe there’s a skill you’re actively trying to get better at, or maybe you’ve been afraid to get started. In either case, try these five simple principles and see if you can make a breakthrough.
Try becoming a (relative) expert in something you’ve always wanted to learn or do. There are few things as rewarding and fun as acquiring new skills and knowledge that enrich your life.

By: Corbett Barr
Source: Zen Habits

Three Things You Need to Know About Recognition

I can live for two months on a good compliment – Mark Twain

A story is told how one day the great Italian artist Michelangelo happened to overhear a group of people admiring his Pieta, a statue of Christ on His mother’s kneeafter His death on the cross. One man attributed the work to another sculptor, much to the chagrin of Michelangelo, who took particular pride in the Pieta. Returning to the sculpture after dark that evening, Michelangelo carved his name on it so that no similar mistake would occur in the future.

In your workplace, does recognition matter? Is it a motivator? John Baldoni, author of the book, Great Motivation Secrets of Great Leaders, says it does. “It matters a great deal. As mentioned earlier, employees have a strong desire for recognition.” Baldoni summarizes the findings of Catherine Meeks, president of Meek Associates who has conducted thousands of employee interviews. Meeks states, “If I had to pick one thing that comes through to me loud and clear it’s that organizations do a lousy job of recognizing people’s contributions.”

One pitfall leaders face is in giving proper recognition where deserved and having to cater to employees who require a lot of strokes. Dave Ramsey, in his highly acclaimed new book, EntreLeadership, says, “Too many people in business have become so shallow that they are merely transactional, not relational. The people on your payroll are not units of production, they are people.” That is practical advice worth remembering. Understanding the practice recognition and how it impacts your business is important. Consider these three benefits and the difference it can make.

Recognition builds morale. The hard work and efforts of your team are worth praising and recognition is always an investment in your people. Highly motivated people do not necessarily need the recognition, but it does signify that you are mindful of their hard work and that it is appreciated. For others who require more strokes it can be the spark they need to go to a new level.
Dale Carnegie says, “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” Do you want to build morale in your organization? Would you like to see an uptick in productivity? When you recognize team members it builds morale and the environment you create will give wind to your sails.

Recognition breeds loyalty. On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your employee- to- employer loyalty quotient? Rensis Likert said, “The greater the loyalty of a group toward the group, the greater is the motivation among the members to achieve the goals of the group, and the greater the probability that the group will achieve its goals.” Recognition and loyalty go hand-in-hand. If you want to build a culture of loyalty first begin with recognition.

From her employee interviews, Catherine Meeks quotes them as saying, “If my boss would just say thank you, if he would just acknowledge that I exist. The only time I hear anything is when I screw up. I never hear when I do a good job.” That type of attitude will do more to breed contempt than it will ever do to build loyalty. Loyalty is reciprocal and when it is not given it should not be expected. In short, loyalty is a two-way street.

Recognition builds bridges. When you build morale and loyalty within your organization, you are building up the greatest resource you have — your people. What is your R+V=P score? The formula is: Recognition +Value = Performance. In short, a team that is recognized and valued will perform with greater purpose and performance.

Do you need to build bridges to greater productivity, or new clientele? How about building bridges to better relationships in your office? When morale is strong then loyalty will not be far behind. Couple strong morale and loyalty and you now have the winning ingredients to create a climate of excellence.

Who have you recognized today?

By: Doug Dickerson
Source: Leaders Beacon

The Surfer's Guide to Personal Development

A few years ago I wrote an article here about navigating the waters of life.

Surfers have a different relationship with the ocean than most people do. Rather than admire its beauty from the sidelines, we feed off its energy because for most of us it’s a second home. We’re more comfortable in water than on land. It’s much more than a sport, but our calling in life. Every session leaves us with powerful life lessons and today I just wanted to share a few of my most important ones with you.

Live in the moment, but keep your eyes on the horizon

If there’s anything that surfing really teaches you it’s how to be present. When you’re on a wave you really can’t think bout another thing and if you do you will find yourself submerged rather quickly. But, the interesting thing is that you have to keep your eyes on the horizon and anticipate when the next wave will arrive. Life is kind of the same way. We need to live in the moment, while being mindful of our future goals and plans. However if live too far in the future our performance in the presence suffers.

Embrace the Unknown
Every single time you paddle for a wave you’re taking a risk because there’s no telling how it’s going to turn out. You’re either going to take a hard fall or experience the ride of your life. When you do catch that ride every sense of fear, doubt, and uncertainty disappears and you’re overcome by a sense of pure bliss that words can hardly describe. In life when when we’re willing take risks, and step into the unknown we dramatically raise our potential for the possibility of an extraordinary life. Everything you know and are confident in today was once an unknown that required a leap of faith. So embrace the unknown.

Learn to Shake The Wipeouts
If you want to ride waves you have to be ok with the occasional wipeout. In his recent graduation speech at U-Penn, Denzel Washington eloquently said “you will suck a something and you will fail.” That’s just a part of life and once you learn to realize that your failures don’t define you, but build character you can learn to shake the wipeouts.

All It Takes is One Good Wave
Talk to anybody who surfs and they’ll tell you their addiction started with that very first wave. Standing up for the first time is the hardest part of learning how to surf. But once you do, you can never get enough of that rush. Accomplishing anything in life is kind of the same. It might take a while for you to hit your stride, but once you do it will have been totally worth it and all it takes is one major milestone to establish your confidence and keep you pushing yourself to the next level.

There’s Always Another Wave Coming
The ocean teaches you abundance because there is always another wave coming. But if you’re too caught up in the one you missed or didn’t’ catch you won’t be there to catch your wave when it arrives. People talk quite a bit about missed opportunities. When you dwell on the past and the opportunities you missed, you’ll be looking back instead of seeing the opportunity that might be right there in front of you. So don’t sweat it when you miss your chance and believe at your core that there is always another wave coming.

Nature Rewards Patience
When you’re in the ocean you’re on mother nature’s schedule rather than your own. You learn to be extremely patient. In life we have a tendency to want to force the order in which things happen and we end up creating the very resistance that kills our flow. When we become patient and let nature take its course we’re able to navigate the waters of life with far more ease.

The ocean is an incredible teacher. There won’t be a single day that it doesn’t leave you humbled, grateful and slightly wiser.

 

By: Srinivas Rao

Source: Dumb Little Man

A Killer of Success

If you were to start a business today from scratch, how long would you work to see a profit until you would decide to just quit? Of course the time line would depend on the business, but I would imagine your answer to be something that was at least a year. The reality is however, many people would quit well before the year is up. So what is one of the main causes and killers of success? The answer is impatience.

With all the hype and advertisements enticing us to give into our instant gratification urges, it seems that more and more people are getting a bit impatient when it comes to producing results. Think about people who go on a weight loss program and quit after a few months. The only reason they quit was because they weren't seeing the results they wanted quick enough.

Have you ever done this? Have you ever set a goal and only after a few weeks or even months of working on it, you decided to quit? I realize that sometimes people are just doing the wrong things, but many times, they were just expecting too much too soon. If you want to be able to stick with your goal until you achieve it, then you must be patient. Anything worth obtaining will take time.

So how do you deal with impatient feelings? You get knowledgeable and plan it out. You must do a bit of research to find out about how long it would take to accomplish your chosen goal, then plan out your actions and expectations accordingly. Too often people will throw themselves onto the path of achieving a goal without know how long it will actually take.

If you wanted to lose 50 pounds, for example, you must find out how many pounds a month you should expect to lose. That way, when your first 30 days is up, and you step on the scale and see that you have lost 8 pounds, you will be motivated to keep on going. Suppose you didn't know this piece of information and expected to lose all 50 pounds the first month. If you see that you've only lost 8 pounds, you will most likely get discouraged and quit.

Being patient just comes down to knowing what to expect. If you expect to be in your car for an hour in traffic while driving home from work, you'll be more patience with the slow moving traffic compared to the guy who thought the drive would only be 20 minutes. So the next time you set a goal, take the time to find out how long you should expect it to take to obtain that goal. This will help increase your chances of not quitting too soon. Just be careful not to buy into promises from people who are trying to sell you something since many tend to exaggerate.
By: Kevin Ngo
Source: Motivational Well Being

Motivation Refueled: 12 Ways to Find It if You Lose it Along the Way

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.”
Zig Ziglar

“I was thinking one day and I realized that if I just had somebody behind me all the way to motivate me I could make a big difference. Nobody came along like that so I just became that person for myself.”
Unknown

Staying motivated until you reach your goals and dreams isn’t always easy. There are often roadblocks, plateaus and valleys along the way where you can get into a slump. Or a rut. And feel like your motivation has flown away.

So today I would like to share 12 ways that I have used to find that motivation again. I hope you’ll find something helpful here.

1. Refocus on doing what YOU really, really like to do. When you really like doing something then the motivation to do it comes automatically (most of the time). And when you really want something then it simply becomes easier to push through any inner resistance you feel. So if you lose your motivation, ask yourself: Am I doing what I really want to do? If not and if possible, refocus and start working on that very important thing instead.
2. Make a list of upsides. Write down all the benefits you will get from achieving something, like for example getting into better shape or making more money. Save it and then pull that list out of the drawer whenever your motivation is lacking again and review it. Or put it somewhere where you will see it every day until you reach your dream. This is a powerful way to reconnect with your motivation and reasons for taking action.
3. Make a list of downsides. You can combine this with the list of upsides to give yourself even more motivation to start moving and get things done. Ask yourself: how will my life look in 5 years if I continue to stay on the same path as now? How will life likely become worse for me and maybe even for the people around me? Try to see the negative consequences as vividly as you can in your mind to kickstart your motivation to start going for that positive change again.
4. Spend 3 minutes with remembering your successes. If you lose your motivation then it is easy to get stuck in looking at your failures and so you get stuck in that slump. So instead, sit down for three minutes and just remember your successes. Let them wash over you and refuel your inspiration and motivation.
5. Go for a bigger goal. Set a big goal that inspires you even if it may seem a tad unrealistic at the moment. If you have too easily achievable goals then you may find that they don’t give you that motivational spark and drive. When you start to think a bit bigger then you get motivated and your mind starts looking for the solutions that will help you achieve that goal. Thinking too small can leave you with a “meh…” feeling or make you feel like you can do it later.
6. Remember how far you have come and compare yourself with yourself. Comparing what you have and your results to what other people have and have accomplished can really kill your motivation. There are always people ahead of you. So focus on you. On your results. And how you can and have improved your results. This is important because it’s a great motivator to see how much you have improved and how far you have come. Often you can be pleasantly surprised when you do such a review.
7. Reconnect with optimism. How you perceive what you are doing or are about to do makes a huge difference. The positive and constructive way of looking at things energizes and inspires you. It makes it easier to keep going even when you hit roadblocks. So ask yourself questions like: What is awesome about this situation? What can I learn from this and what is the opportunity in this situation? How can I or we solve this and what is the next small step that I or we can take to do so?
8. Work out. I like this one because even if you feel too frustrated and down to do ask yourself the right questions you can still drag yourself to the gym or wherever you go to exercise. And if you just do your pretty mindless repetitions then your body will do the rest. Endorphins, testosterone and other chemicals will be released. Inner tensions will loosen up and leave your body. Your negative emotional pattern will be broken. And new energy will be added to your body.
9. Talk about it. Sometimes you just need to let it out and talk to someone about your motivational low point. Letting it all out can release a lot of pent up emotion and let you get a new, more positive and healthy perspective on things. Often we build our own small or medium-sized problems into big scary monsters in our minds. Letting the monsters out into the light and letting others see them can make us realize that we were making a too big of a deal of it all. It allows us to lighten up a bit, to not take things too seriously and to start moving out of the self-created slump. So talk to a friend or family member. Or try an anonymous internet forum with likeminded people.
10. Remember to have fun. It’s easy to get wrapped up in the seriousness of a task and the stress and tension of completing it. So remember that you are allowed to have fun when you are working on it. There is no rule that says you have to be all serious about it all the time. When you can, create fun in a task. Compete with yourself to finish it even faster than you did the last time, whistle a nice tune while working or have fun and joke around with your co-workers and class mates.
11. Start moving and let the motivation catch up with you. Many times I have found it better to just do it and start working instead of trying to motivate myself to get going. At first what you do may suck quite a bit and it’s hard going. But after a while inspiration and motivation seems to catch up with you. Things start to flow easier and your work is of a higher quality.
12. Take a break. Yeah, sometimes you just need to take a break. Perhaps your time-plan for your goal or new habit is just too optimistic? Maybe you have worked harder than you can manage right now. Then take a break. A few hours or days of rest and recuperation can change how you feel in a remarkable way and recharge your batteries.

By: Henrik Edberg
Source: Positivity Blog 

How Safe Are Your Perceptions?

Any person who selects a goal in life which can be fully achieved, has already defined his own limitations. – Cavett Robert

In his book, Winning Every Day, legendary football coach Lou Holtz shares a story about a
man whose car tumbled into a ditch. He called a farmer for some help, but the
farmer said, “You’d need a team of young stallions to pull that car. I only
have one horse, Dusty. He’s blind and old. We’ll bring him over to the ditch,
though, and see what he can do. But don’t expect too much.”

The farmer hitched Dusty to the car, snapped a whip in the air, and said, “Pull, Jimmy
pull!” Dusty never moved. The farmer snapped the whip again and said, “Pull,
Sammy pull.” Dusty still didn’t move. The farmer snapped the whip a third time
and said, “Pull Charley pull.” Dusty remained still. The farmer snapped the
whip the fourth time and said, “Pull, Dusty pull.” With one mighty tug, Dusty
yanked the car out of the ditch.

The grateful driver shook the farmer’s hand and said, “Thanks for freeing my car; but
there’s something I don’t understand. Dusty never moved when you kept calling
him by those different names. Why didn’t you just call Dusty by his name from
the start?” The farmer replied, “I had to call out those three names first.
Dusty is blind. If he’d thought he had to do all that work by himself, he never
would have even tried.”

The perceptions you have go a long way not only in defining your leadership style
but in shaping the direction of your organization. Get it wrong and the
consequences can be devastating. Despite the perceptions of the farmer, the horse
accomplished the task and removed the car from the ditch. What will be the
consequence of your perceptions? Here are three things to remember as you
formulate your perceptions about your organization and your people.

Perceptions shape your reality. The perception you place on your
organization or colleagues is a powerful belief. Consider this; if the people
in your organization were to rise to the level of your perception of them,
would your organization be in a better place?

While it’s been said that perception is reality, that statement is not quite true. It
becomes true when you and your team take ownership of it. Sherwood Eddy said,
“Faith is not trying to believe something regardless of the evidence; faith is
daring to do something regardless of the consequences.” And this is the secret
to your leadership. The greatest compliment you can give to your team is a
faith in them that surpasses your perceptions of them.

Perceptions shape your direction. What you believe about your people
and what they buy into shapes the direction all of you will travel. Consider
this; if the people in your organization were to go in the direction of your
perceptions of them where would that take you? Your perceptions are to your
organization what a rudder is to a ship. Perceptions navigate the direction of
your organization.

John Maxwell writes, “Being able to navigate for others requires a leader to possess a
positive attitude. You’ve got to have faith that you can take your people all
the way. If you can’t confidently make the trip in your mind, you’re not going
to be able to take it in real life. Sometimes it’s difficult balancing optimism
and realism, intuition and planning, faith and fact. But that’s what it takes
to be effective as a navigating leader.” If you are not comfortable with the
direction you are taking your team then examine your perceptions. Your team
deserves a leader with a positive attitude who has faith in their ability.

Perceptions shape your destiny. If you want to know what the future
has in store for you as a leader and that of your organization then look no
further than your perceptions. Consider this; if you and your organization are
going to live out the destiny of your perceptions of them, do you have a bright
future?

Your team deserves a leader who does not put a lid on potential, but by his or her perceptions
communicates that its future is bright and its possibilities are limitless. Abraham
Lincoln said, “The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at
a time.” And one day at a time our perceptions shape our reality, our
direction, and our destiny. How safe are your perceptions?

By: Doug Dickerson
Source: Leader's Beacon

Steve Jobs' 10 Secrets to Building a Huge Empire

Steve Paul Jobs was born on February 24th, 1955. He is known to be the Chairman, co-founder as well as the CEO of the Apple Inc. He was also the former CEO of well known Pixar Animation Studios. He was also represented among the Board of Directors of the Walt Disney Company. Not bad!

He completed his studies in California and later he did his frequent after-school lectures in Palo Alto at the Hewlett Packard Company. In a few months time, he was hired in the same place and from there his career started to accelerate. The great personality exhibited by Steve Jobs was told and appreciated far and wide. He was referred to as one of Silicon Valley’s leading egomaniac by Fortune Magazine.

It was in the year 1976 when he founded the company he named Apple Inc. Presently, Jobs is referred to as the single largest shareholder in the Walt Disney Company and also one among its Board of Directors. His presence and appreciation in both the computer as well as entertainment field is remarkable.

With his fame, he is well known for whatever came out from his mouth and was thus noted to be quoted. In casual conversation, Steve Jobs seems to come up with earth-moving quotes. The mastery of this is that most of his quotes can be applied to the the jobs we all have, the careers we all seek, and the lives we all want to lead.

Let's take a look at some of the great quotes of this modern day tech and media leader.

1. To Build up Confidence

   “We don’t get a chance to do that many things, so every one should be really excellent. Because this is our life. Life is brief, and then you die, you know?"

   
   Steve Jobs is confident in whatever decisions he makes and he talks about what has taken him to great heights. He also insists all of us to be good to the heart as our lives are short and death can arrive at any time.
2. On Confidence and Creativity

   “That happens more than you think, because this is not just engineering and science. There is art, too. Sometimes when you’re in the middle of these crises, you’re not sure you’re going to make it to the other end. But we’ve always made it, and so we have a certain degree of confidence, although sometimes you wonder."

   
   People are terrified at times. However, those that make choices based on real criteria, regardless of the conceptual nature of them, can confidently stand behind them and are able to shake off the uncertainties that arise.
3. On the Experience as a User

   “Our DNA is as a consumer company – for that individual customer who’s voting thumbs up or thumbs down. That’s who we think about. And we think that our job is to take responsibility for the complete user experience. And if it’s not up to the par, it’s our fault, plain and simple."

   
   User satisfaction is not just for business owners. Your boss could be considered as a user of your output. By mastering your trade and ensuring a complete and accurate output (albeit a report, a design, an article, etc.), your 'users' will be happy and reward you with continued business.
4. On Focus

   “People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully.”

   
   The real meaning of focus is not the simple yes. Instead, it is all about the ideas which are imparted by picking and sorting the best out. Careful detection and estimation of your plans and the ideas and strategies taken to implement them are what Steve Jobs is talking about.
5. On Passion

   “When I hire somebody really senior, competence is the ante; they have to be really smart. But the real issue for me is, are they going to fall in love with Apple? Because if they in love with Apple, everything else will take care of itself.”

   
   This comes down to passion. When you have passion for what you do, good results and dedication are sure follow. Identifying your passion is difficult but once there, work is no longer work. As a worker, find and live your passion. As an employer, get employees to really see the vision and their role in taking the company there.
   
6. On Leadership Qualities

   “So when a good idea comes, you know, part of my job is to move it around, just see what different people think, get people talking about it, argue with people about it, get ideas moving among that group of 100 people, get different people together to explore different aspects of it quietly, and, you know – just explore things."

   
   Cisco Systems had a great motto at one point that read, "We are stronger together than we'll ever be apart." Many times, good ideas are made great by seeking input from others. By surrounding yourself with people that you'd admit are smarter than you, greatness has a chance.
7. On Product Tactics

   “It’s not about pop culture, and it’s not about fooling people, and it’s not about convincing people that they want something they don’t. We figure out what we want. And I think we’re pretty good at having the right discipline to think through whether a lot of other people are going to want it, too. That’s what we get paid to do.”

   
   This is about legitimacy. Getting paid is great but executing on a long term vision based on demand is a true art.
8. On Succession Planning

   “I mean, some people say, ‘Oh God, if [Jobs] got run over by a bus, Apple would be in trouble.’ And, you know, I think it wouldn’t be a party, but there are really capable people at Apple. My job is to make the whole executive team good enough to be successors, so that’s what I try to do.”

   
   The real work of a CEO is to lay pipe (sort of speak). A good CEO is laying the groundwork for an organization to succeed on its own - today and tomorrow. Much of this has to do not only with the people that surround you, but letting go of the ego.
9. On LayOffs

   “We’ve had one of these before, when the dot-com bubble burst. What I told our company was that we were just going to invest our way through the downturn, that we weren’t going to lay off people, that we’d taken a tremendous amount of efforts to get them into Apple in the first place – the last thing we were going to do is lay them off.”

   
   When you make a concrete effort to only hire the best employees, releasing them may cost more than keeping them around. Sure. Unproductive employees need to go but mass layoffs versus a strategic realignment that moves expertise, is a clear alternative. Choices like this, short term gain versus long term impairment, are critical ones to make.
10. On the job of Recruiting

    “Recruiting is hard. It’s just finding the needles in the haystack. You can’t know enough in a one-hour interview. So, in the end, it’s ultimately based on your gut. How do I feel about this person? What are they like when challenged? I ask everybody that: ‘Why are you here?’ The answer isn't very important, it’s the meta-data."

    
    The recruiting job is tough indeed and not as easy as you'd think. If you, as a hirer, get to someone's core, you have a chance at understanding them. This is what Steve Jobs would love to say about the entire process of hiring people for work. He also finds it similar to looking out for the needles in the haystack which is simply as impossible as it should be.

There are plenty more quotes given out by Steve Jobs. However, these form a decent foundation that you can take to you life in the effort to find great success, for attaining hopes, and building up a real huge empire!

 

By: Manish Pandey

Source: Dumb Little Man

The Best Way to Drug Your Employees

I would have been on time but an employee stopped me with a legitimate safety concern, so I walked into the meeting five minutes late.

My boss had his back turned as he wrote on a whiteboard, so I slipped quietly into a chair and made a cringing, lips pursed, “sorry…” face to the group.

“Glad you could grace us with your presence,” my boss said, without turning around.

“I’m sorry, I –”

“I don’t give a crap what you’re sorry about,” he interrupted. Voice rising he said, “Don’t want to hear your excuses either. If you can’t be on time don’t show up at all… hell, come to think of it, why don’t you just leave.”

I was shocked. He was often volatile, but never like this — and never towards me. As I started to apologize again he whirled around, pointed to the door, and said, “Seriously. Get out. Now!”
When I still didn’t move he held out his hand, palm down, and flicked his fingers towards me as if to say, “Shoo.”

So shoo I did: Embarrassed, angry, humiliated, ashamed, outraged… you name it, I felt it.
For the next few hours I was worthless. I fumbled from task to task and struggled to stay focused with employees who needed me. I kept trying to pull myself together but couldn’t — and I felt like a failure since I couldn’t just suck it up and move on.

As it turns out, I shouldn’t have felt like a failure. My inability to move past the incident wasn’t completely my fault.

My boss had drugged me.

“A disrespectful behavior automatically triggers a squirt of cortisol into our brains,” says Paul Meshanko, founder and Managing Partner of Legacy Business Cultures. “Cortisol shuts down the prefrontal cortex and triggers the flight or fight mechanism. So our focus turns inward and we lose the ability to fully engage with other people, to help other people, to be creative and energized and motivated — because our body automatically concentrates on surviving, not thriving.”

Disrespectful behaviors come in all flavors and generate different size doses of cortisol, of course. Getting tossed from the room was fairly extreme (at least based on what I was accustomed to) and as a result so was my physiological reaction.

It can take between three and four hours for a sizable disrespect “injection” to wear off. A sneer or a snarky comment would have generated a smaller squirt of cortisol and less of a physical reaction, and the effects would have lasted for a shorter period of time.

“But even when the initial effects finally go away, the process isn’t over,” Paul says. “When we think about a particular incident later we receive another squirt of cortisol and feel similar effects. Disrespect is like the anti-gift; instead of the gift that keeps on giving, it’s the ‘gift’ that keeps on taking.”

It doesn’t have to be that way, though. When we are treated with respect, a dose of serotonin and oxytocin is squirted into our brains.
Encouragement, praise, appreciation… even the smallest behaviors that help create a more respectful workplace can automatically trigger a powerful biological response, leading to:

• Improved self esteem
• Greater job satisfaction
• Better cooperation and teamwork
• Higher productivity
• Greater customer satisfaction

Hard to believe? It’s not: When we feel better about ourselves — and we feel better about the people who lead us — we try harder. And we treat others better, too. Think about the best boss you’ve ever had; he or she made you feel capable, respected, and valued. We will run through walls for those leaders.

And it doesn’t take much on your part. Say an employee deftly handles a customer complaint. You praise her and squirt! — she’s more motivated, more enthusiastic, shows more initiative… all because she feels good about herself and the job she does. Studies show that something as simple as a sincere compliment makes it much more likely a behavior will occur again in the future and much more likely that behavior will occur without prompting.

Your interactions with employees — in fact with everyone — trigger biological responses. That’s just how it works; in simple terms, our bodies automatically react to certain stimuli, so we in effect drug each other through our actions, at work and elsewhere. Sincerely compliment your significant other and the response is automatically positive; yell at your children and they naturally shut down. They can’t help it.

We can’t help it. It’s how we’re made.

So you have a choice:

• Treat employees with indifference or, worse, a lack of respect and their performance suffers, often for hours; or
• Actively treat employees with respect so they will be happier, healthier, and much more productive.

The choice is always yours, and here’s the great part — it’s a choice you get to make hundreds of times a day.

By Jeff Haden
Source: BNET

13 Incredibly Simple Ways to Overcome the Fear of Failure

Imagine if you could do anything in the world without feeling fear or any negative feelings whatsoever.
The fear of failure is instilled in us from early childhood because of overly protective parents. It’s not easy to hear the words “No!” over and over again.
After awhile you start getting cautious about what you do. You constantly look to an authority figure to see if it’s okay.
As we grow, this negative belief becomes unconscious. You don’t even know it’s there. You just live your life as best as you can.
Overcoming fear of failure is not easy by any means, but it can be done, especially if you are determined to take your personal growth to the next level.
There is no magic pill that will transform you into a fearless hero, only steps that will take you closer to freedom from the imaginary jail cell of your mind.

1. Identify the Root Cause

“Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald

Where does your fear of failure originate?
Sit down, take a few deep breaths, ask yourself when your fear of failure was formed, and observe what you see, feel, or hear.
When you see what caused your fear of failure, you’ll also see that your mind’s interpretation is far from accurate.
If your parents were overly protective, or if you had a particularly strict teacher, you’ll see that they did it because they want the best for you.
It’s easy to see how the you of the past interpreted events as he or she did. But if you look at the event as an outsider, you will see that it had nothing to do with you.
It’s crucial to examine all of your negative beliefs, because they have a big influence on how you live your life.

2. Simplify

“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” — Leonardo da Vinci

Complexity is hard to visualize, and if you try, you will feel overwhelmed. Everything will feel hopeless and not worth doing, because you just don’t know how.
When I began my online journey, I was overwhelmed to say the least. I had no idea of where to go, what to do, or how to do it.
When I simplified the tasks that I needed to do, it all became much easier. I had no problem taking action because I had broken everything down into actionable pieces.
And if I didn’t know what to do, I’d ask someone, or join a training program.
I took the task of starting a website and broke it down to coming up with a domain name, buying hosting, getting a website up and running, and getting a simple design.
It also didn’t hurt that I was determined to make it work. If you don’t have that fire burning inside of you, you should think twice about moving forward.
Find your passion, and boldly go where you have never gone before.

3. Failure is Inevitable

“It is foolish to fear what you cannot avoid.” — Publius Syrus

Let’s face it, failure is inevitable if you want to live a remarkable life. I know you want to live a life full of passion, meaning, and purpose.
We all do.
But it’s not going to happen if you succumb to your fears and try to look for a more comfortable way out, because there is none.
Sooner or later you will have to overcome the fear of failure, and you will have to overcome many other fears during your lifetime.
Sometimes it’s overwhelming, frustrating, and exhausting. I know, I’ve been there, but the more you move through tough periods, the faster you’ll grow.
If you want the life of your dreams, make failure a part of your life.
Embrace it.

4. Fail More. Succeed More.

“There is no failure. Only feedback.” — Robert Allen

The more you fail, the more you succeed.
I was lucky to learn that lesson early in my life. When I became a professional poker player, I was 18, and I already knew that the more feedback I got, the faster I would learn.
I crave constructive criticism. It is a chance for me to improve what I’m doing.
I never assume that I know it all, nor do I assume that I am above failure. Even the most successful people fail every single day.
The difference between the successful and the not-yet-successful is the realization that failure is simply a stepping stone, not a permanent event.

5. Failure is Temporary

“Failure is an event, never a person.” — William D. Brown

Failure feels permanent, but it isn’t. You and I both know that, but we don’t act like it is so.
You may imagine yourself failing and the movie in your head stops there. If you let the movie play, you will realize that that failure may be exactly what you needed.
It may be the messenger of the lesson you needed to succeed down the road. Failure isn’t easy, but it is what will make you the person you want to become.
I’ve failed more times than I can count, yet I still fear failure. The difference now versus when I was in my late teens is that I know that the fear of failure is just a thought.
It conjures up feelings in my body that feel bad. It has no bearing in reality. It is often exaggerated and out of control.
Most people never stop to observe their thoughts. And they never stop to ponder that their thoughts could be wrong.
Why give your thoughts all that authority if they make you feel bad?

6. Free Your Mind

“The mind is everything. What you think you become.” — Buddha

See your thoughts for what they are … thoughts.
Thoughts can be eliminated, feelings can be alleviated, and fears can be overcome.
You can do this by taking massive action and facing your fears. You can also use methods such as The Work, EFT, and meditation.
I have personally been using EFT since I was 16. I have been meditating on and off for the same time. And I recently got acquainted with The Work.
I won’t delve into how you can use them in this article, because it would simply take up too much space, so I suggest you visit the websites of EFT and The Work, and read my article on how to meditate.
There’s more to life than being a slave to your mind, your programming, and the beliefs of society. You think what you become, so make sure you get it right on the inside before you blame the outside.
So many people try to get more money, better relationships, and seek happiness only to end up where they started.
They seek something outside of themselves, when everything they wanted was right in front of them.

7. Shift Your Perspective

“Failure teaches success.” — Japanese Saying

Who taught you that failure was a bad thing?
It feels bad, so it must be bad. Is that really true?
Every belief and thought that makes us feel bad needs to be examined. What good does a fear of failure do us?
It’s easier said than done to eliminate negative beliefs, but it all starts with being aware that a problem actually exists.
The last thing you want to do is get mad at yourself for not being perfect. We all have our unique fears and they are there for a reason.
Your fears will help you grow in the way you need to grow. You realize your negative beliefs when they need to be realized. There is no rush. This is not a competition. You’re doing perfectly.
Look at each failure as a blessing in disguise. It is not through success that we become wise, but through our failures.
I learned this lesson particularly well when I played poker for a living for half a decade. In poker, luck is a big factor, which means that you can play well, but still lose for weeks and months.
It can be extremely frustrating, but what it teaches you is discipline, and it teaches you to constantly improve your game.
It taught me one of the most valuable lessons of my life, which is to look at the negative periods as times of learning.
The same goes for life. Whenever you’re faced with something particularly difficult, learn from it and grow, because it will pass.

8. Self Growth

“Supposing you have tried and failed again and again. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call “failure” is not the falling down, but the staying down.” — Mary Pickford

We all have the same basic fears. While same get through them easily, others get stuck. Use your fears as signposts that tell you where you have room to grow.
Fear of failure is something everyone faces at one point or another. This isn’t the end of the world, but the beginning of an amazing journey.
I know you may feel like being afraid of failure is horrible. That is because you imagine it to be so in your mind. Look at the pictures and thoughts that come up when you think about the fear of failure.
What do you see? Do you see yourself failing in front of a large group of people, which then proceed to laugh and point?
They are nothing but thoughts. You can get through them if you want to. You’ve already taken the first step by reading this article.
Even if you wanted to go back to your comfortable existence, it’s already too late, because the seed has been planted by you reading this article

9. Embrace Fear

“We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face… we must do that which we think we cannot.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

Everyone is afraid to one degree or another. No one is different. It’s ingrown into our biological mechanism.
The sooner you befriend your fear, the faster you can keep moving forward. It is not fear that stops you from going after your dreams, but what you decide to do because of those fears.
You can reprogram the way you react to your fears, thoughts, and worries. Whenever I am working on something that is important, such as doing what I love, and a fear pops up, I know I will get through it.
The alternative is giving up, which isn’t an option.
If you are determined to go after your passion, your fears will become insignificant in comparison.

10. Take Action

“I failed my way to success.” — Thomas Edison

We have more knowledge at our fingertips now than ever before in history. The internet gives you access to endless amounts of courses, guides, and training programs.
No matter what you want to do, you can learn. It’s fantastic. But it can also be paralyzing and a breeding ground for fear.
The what if thoughts enter your mind and you start worrying about this and that. No matter what, if you take action, you will eventually end up in the right place.
When you blend action with the guidance that comes from your heart, your progress will be fast, powerful, and fulfilling.
You see, while most people sit at the sidelines waiting for the perfect moment, you will be out there learning, doing, and growing.
That is what will get you to the life of your dreams.

11. Imagine Your Future

“What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?” — Vincent van Gogh

Sometimes negativity helps.
Imagine your future if you let every fear you had control your life.
What does it look like?
Where would you end up?
Do you think you would regret it when you’re at the end of your life?
Now imagine your life if you had overcome every fear on your path. You would be living the life of you always desired.
You would look back at your life without regrets. Sure, you may have done some foolish things, but they just added some spice to your life.
You can sit home and feel sorry for yourself all you want, but it isn’t going to make your life different. Only you have the power to change your life, so you might as well start now.

12. Stay in the Now

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” – Buddha

Most of us live in either the past or in the future.
We regret what we’ve done (or not done), or we worry about what’s to come.
Using the past and present is fine when done with a purpose, like #11 up there, but letting your mind run amok will do you no good, as you probably already know.
There are no problems in the present. You are okay right now. You have a roof over your head, you have food in the fridge, and you feel fine.
You would be fine without a roof as well. What would make it not okay is your mind, and the stories it tells around your situation.
Accept the gift that is the present moment.
Breathe, smell, hear, and enjoy who you are, right now. You already have the key to your happiness.

13. Follow Your Passion

“No man is a failure who is enjoying life.” — William Feather

Last, but definitely not least is to follow your passion. We both knew this was coming .
If you decide to follow your passion, you will be much more likely to blast through your fears.
You know, like me, that doing anything other than going after your dreams is not an option. I might feel secure in a regular job, but I would never be happy or fulfilled.
Sometimes I feel like I am not living life, but life is living me. I go with my feelings and my heart. I do what excites me.

It’s an interesting way to live, and I invite you to try it.

Overcoming fear of failure is as hard as you make it. When you face your fears, you will realize that they are nowhere as bad as you thought they would be.

So what will it be?

Your fears, or the life of your dreams?

By: Henri
Source: Wake Up Cloud

What Does Your Opportunity Look Like?

What Does Your Opportunity Look Like?

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. – Winston Churchill

A story is told some years ago about a young energetic man who began work as a clerk in a hardware store. Like many old-time hardware stores, the inventory included thousands of dollars’ worth of items that were obsolete or seldom called for by customers.
The young man was smart enough to know that no thriving business could carry such an inventory and still show a healthy profit. He proposed a sale to get rid of the stuff. The owner was reluctant but finally agreed to let him set up a table in the middle of the store and try to sell off a few of the oldest items. Every product was priced at ten cents.

The sale was a success and the young fellow got permission to run a second sale. It, too, went over just as well as the first. This gave the young clerk an idea. Why not open a store that would sell only nickel and dime items? He could run the store and his boss could supply the capital.
The young man’s boss was not enthusiastic. “The plan will never work,” he said, “because you can’t find enough items to sell at a nickel and a dime.” The young man was disappointed but eventually went ahead on his own and made a fortune out of the idea. His name was F. W. Woolworth.
Years later the old boss lamented, “As near as I can figure it, every word I used in turning Woolworth down has cost me about a million dollars!”

Victor Chasles said, “The sure way to miss success is to miss the opportunity,” and this is the challenge for leaders today. What opportunities are before you? Here are three simple reminders to help give you perspective about garnering the most of them.

Opportunities are not always obvious. Even at a young age, F.W. Woolworth saw a golden opportunity for a new business. But this was not the case with his boss. The rationale was there simply would not be enough items to sell for a nickel and a dime to be profitable.

After the eventual success of F. W. Woolworth, the old boss in hindsight realized that he missed out on a tremendous opportunity. And this is the challenge you face in today’s economy. There will always be those making excuses as to why something can’t be done, while others will go out and do it. While others may be oblivious to opportunities around them, do not be discouraged. Focus on your goals and dare to do the impossible. The bottom line: opportunities do not have to be obvious to others, just you.

Opportunities are not always popular. Woolworth’s boss refused to finance his department store idea. The same prologue can be written for many other successful entrepreneurs who, despite rejection and disappointment, forged ahead with purpose and seized their opportunity.

Take FedEx founder Fred Smith as an example. While attending Yale University, he wrote a paper on the need for reliable overnight delivery in a computerized information age. His professor found the premise improbable, and to the best of Smith’s recollection, he only received a grade of C for the effort, but the idea stayed with him.

Jim Rohn said, “If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.” And this is why you must embrace your opportunity regardless of how it looks to others or what they say about it. The bottom line: opportunities do not have to be popular with others, just you.

Opportunities are always knocking. We are living in unprecedented times. While many bemoan the current economy and are anxious about the future, this is your time to seize upon the greatest opportunities of our generation. In this environment the opportunities may not be obvious, or popular, but exist for those looking.

Alexander Graham Bell said, “When one door closes another door opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which open for us.” When you focus on the opportunities before you and not worry about the past, you can breathe new life into your future. The bottom line: opportunities will always knock, are you paying attention?

By: Doug Dickerson
Source: Leaders Beacon

Bruce Lee’s Top 20 Tips for Living a Successful Life

When I grew up, Bruce Lee was one of my biggest role models, and he still is.
He accomplished more in ten years than most people do in a lifetime. So I decided to gather Bruce Lee’s most inspirational quotes in one place.
The quotes below are what I believe it takes to live a successful life and have success in life. These quotes will inspire, motivate, and encourage you to go after your dreams.
With all that said here are Bruce Lee’s top 20 tips for living a successful life.

1. Apply What You Learn

“Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do.”

How many people do you know that read a lot of books and spend a lot of time buying courses, but never apply the knowledge they learn?
You may even notice these tendencies in your life. It’s hard to take action and apply what you learn, because we’re all afraid of failure, and taking action can be paralyzing from time to time.

However, success in life doesn’t happens until you use the knowledge that you have inside of you. Most of us have exactly what we need to get to our goals, but we make excuses not to even get started.

2. Learn, Discard, Create

“Absorb what is useful, Discard what is not, Add what is uniquely your own.”

It’s all well and good to learn from others, but it’s not until you take action that you discover what works and doesn’t.
When you discover what doesn’t work, you simply discard it and keep going. When you keep moving forward, you will create your own path.
Living a successful life is all about experimenting and trying new things. The more things you try, the closer you will get to true success.

3. Simplicity

“Simplicity is the key to brilliance.”

If you can simplify your life, your goals, and your tasks, you will not only be happier, you will also get more done and be more successful.
It was not until I started focusing on one single task and one major goal in my life that I started seeing rapid results in the direction of my dreams.
If you’re trying to go after multiple things at once, you will end up accomplishing none of them. Pick one thing that’s the most important to you and go after that.
The funny thing about focusing on one goal is that it seems that you’re neglecting all the others aspects of your life, but when you focus on one goal, magically the other aspects of your life improve, sometimes dramatically.

4. Break Barriers

“Using no way as way, using no limitation as limitation.”

We all have negative beliefs that stop us from being as successful in life as we would like.
The only person holding you back is you. Once you become comfortable with overcoming your fears, you will start seeing dramatic success in your life.
One of the most common characteristics of successful people is that they are willing to try new things and face their fears. They are not fearless, they are merely willing to do what it takes.

5. Be Open-Minded

“Take no thought of who is right or wrong or who is better than. Be not for or against.”

There’s no right or wrong in the universe. It’s completely subjective.
Getting caught up in the drama of who is right or wrong or who is better than will only distract you from reaching your goals and creating a successful life.
Stay open to new possibilities, and the viewpoints of others. You can never know what you will learn when you explore things you at first thought were pure nonsense.

6. Contribute

“Real living is living for others.”

It wasn’t until I found my passion and started contributing to the world with my writing that I started feeling fulfilled.
We all have our unique gifts that we can use to make the world a better place. These are usually talents and skills you have that you are very good at, and that you like to do.
It doesn’t matter if you like to make jewelry or if you enjoy cooking, because everything is connected to everything else.
You are here to make a difference with the talents you have. There’s a reason why you are you.

7. Manage Your Time

“If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made up of.”

We are surrounded by distractions, such as e-mail, Twitter, and Facebook. They are great at connecting us to each other, but they distract us from what is truly important.
Learn to manage your time, and get the most valuable tasks done before you start to play. Use time management courses to get your life in order.
You can often double, triple, or even quadruple your productivity by using just a few simple time management tips.
A good one that I use is to write down the three most important tasks for the next day before I go to bed.

8. Be Flexible

“Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.”

Life will throw curve balls at you, so you have to get used to being flexible. The more comfortable you can be with being uncomfortable, the faster you will grow as a human being and the more success you will have in life.
This is exactly what distinguishes successful people from unsuccessful ones. Successful people are more willing to be uncomfortable, because they know that that is the fastest path to their goals.
Whenever you bump into something that makes you feel bad, stay flexible, and find the positive in the situation. I’ve found that most of the problems in my life are blessings in disguise.
The only thing separating positivity from negativity is time.

9. Set Goals

“A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at.”

If you want to create your dream life you want you first have to know what you want. For the longest time I avoided setting goals, because I thought it was unnecessary.
It wasn’t until recently that I discovered that goal setting can not only make me more productive, it can also dramatically increase the clarity I have.
When you set goals, use the S.M.A.R.T criteria, which stands for specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely goals.

10. Be Patient

“A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough.”

One of my weaknesses is my impatience. However, I’ve learned to channel my impatience into getting more done and being productive.
It’s also important to realize that most of the things that are truly valuable in life take time.
For example, I discovered that creating an online business usually takes anywhere from 3 to 5 years, if your goal is a full-time income.
Whatever you do, keep taking small steps each day toward your primary goal, and you will be surprised at how much you can accomplish in just a few years.

11. Kill the Box

“All fixed set patterns are incapable of adaptability or pliability. The truth is outside of all fixed patterns.”

It’s easy to get into a rut, which is simply a familiar pattern that feels comfortable. If you truly want to grow as a person and lead a successful life, you have to get out of the box.
In fact, throw the box out altogether, and start following your heart wherever it leads you. This can be as simple as following your highest excitement in the moment.
Most people are stuck in their minds and never listen to their heart’s deepest desire. Don’t let this be you.

12. Control Your Thoughts

“As you think, so shall you become.”

What you think about, you draw into your life. If you’re constantly being negative, you will draw more negativity into your life.
Instead of focusing on the negative, think about what you want to get out of life and focus on the positive.
This is another way of telling you that you have to set goals and focus on those goals as often as possible. The results you will get by doing this will be dramatic.
Most people sit around whining about their miserable life, and then they wonder why nothing good ever happens to them.

13. Take Action

“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.”

Don’t over analyze and over think. Take massive action even if things aren’t perfect before you start.
Most people that try to get things perfect never get started at all.
I used to be a perfectionist, but I realized that by taking action, I could get much more done and make much more progress.
I also realized that people don’t want perfect. They just want solutions to their problems.

14. Allow

“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.”

It’s easy to get stuck on what other people would think of you if you became successful. Most people are so afraid of this that they never rise above mediocrity.
It is not up to you to make people happy. You can only make yourself happy, and the way others react is just the way they will react.
Don’t let other people dictate how you live your life. Determine what you want, go after it, and don’t look back. You will be much happier for it.

15. Create Your Own Destiny

“To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.”

You can make all the excuses in the world, but nothing happens until you stop blaming your circumstances or people in your life, and take control of your life.
It is up to you to take responsibility for your life and create your own opportunities. You may not be able to do exactly what you want right now, but you have the opportunity to take steps toward it.
No one will create the dream life for you. You have to do it yourself.

16. Be You

“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.”

As I said earlier, you were born with unique talents, gifts, and skills. When you try to be someone you’re not, you will only attract people into your life that are not in harmony with you.
When you are you, and that includes the weird things about you, you will find that the most amazing and interesting people start popping up in your life.
Sometimes this may take years, and sometimes it can happen in just a few days. Let whatever happens be okay and go with the flow.

17. Have Integrity

“Knowledge will give you power, but character respect”

No success in life is worth it unless you have integrity.
It’s very hard to find people that are honest and have integrity as one of their highest values. It’s easy to throw in a lie here and there and try to manipulate people.
Only conscious people realize that this won’t make anyone happy in the long term. It might get you what you want in the short-term but it’s not a recipe for happiness.
Live with integrity, and people will respect you. And best of all, you will respect yourself which is a very desirable character trait.

18. Learn the Rules, Break the Rules

“Obey the principles without being bound by them.”

If you want success in life, learn what other successful people have done to get to where they are.
It’s important to learn the principles of success, but not be bound by them. Once you know what you need to do, follow your heart and your intuition.
If you want to learn how to create a profitable website for example, I recommend you sign up for a training course, and follow the instructions step-by-step.
Once you start seeing success, you can start breaking the rules and begin experimenting.

19. Do Things for You

“Showing off is the fool’s idea of glory.”

Life is not about impressing other people. If you try to show off, it will backfire.
And if you try to seek the approval of others, it will just make you miserable. The only person that needs to approve of you is you.
This goes hand in hand with many of the quotes above. You can only be you, and it is not until you reclaim your unique self that you can be truly great.

20. Believe in Yourself

“You just wait. I’m going to be the biggest Chinese Star in the world.”

Last, but definitely not least are the expectations you have of yourself. Your beliefs will determine the success you have in life.
There are ways to overcome limiting beliefs and negative expectations, but nothing happens until you accept that they exist within you.
And nothing happens until you take full responsibility for the life that you have created in this very moment.

By: Henri
Source : Wake Up Cloud